An elderly couple go into the hospital to see the doctor. The doc says to the old man, “I’ll need urine ,feces and blood samples from you.” The old man says, “Huh?” So the doctor says it again. The old man says, “Huh?” So the doctor screams, “I NEED A URINE SAMPLE, A […]

A skinny little computer geek gets sent to prison for spamming. He gets placed in a cell with a big hairy biker dude. The big biker dude says, “I haven’t had a cellmate in ages and I am hornier than a cat in heat. WE ARE going to have some fun! […]

A bellboy delivers an extravagant room service meal for two to a couple in the penthouse suite.  After he has laid everything out, put the flowers on the table and lit the candles he asks the gentleman, “Will there be anything else for you this evening, Sir?”  “No, I don’t believe so, thank you.” he […]

My wife woke up the other night to find me sobbing on the couch at 3am. She asked me what was the matter. I said ,”Do you remember when we first started dating over ten years ago, when you were just sixteen?” She replied ,”Well of course Honey.” I said ,”I’m […]

Three brothers are drinking in a bar when this dude comes in for a few quick ones. After a couple of drinks he points at the brother in the middle and says, in a drunken slur, “I’ve banged the shit out of your Mom.” The three brothers look kind of shocked and the dude […]

Joe is a the coach of the winningest girl’s track team in state history. His dirty little secret is that he gives the girls steroids. One day his star 440 meter runner shows up in his office with a problem. The girl says,”Coach, I’ve got a real problem here.” The coach […]

This guy has been feeling pretty bad so he breaks down and goes to the doctor. The doctor runs a bunch of tests on him and calls him back in. The doctor says,”I cannot find the cause of your sickness, but I think it is due to drinking excessively.” The guy responds,”Well […]

This college girl comes home to visit for Thanksgiving break. She confesses to her mother, “Mom, I’m no longer a virgin.” The mother responds,”In this day and age I’m frankly surprised this hadn’t happened sooner. I hope that it was an intimate and pleasurable experience for you.” The girl replied,”Well, yes […]

So I call my doctor buddy and explain to him that I think that my son has the clap… I tell him that I think the only woman he has slept with is our maid.
He says, “Don’t be rough with him, these things happen and I can fix him up.”
So I tell him rather […]

This truck driver has been on the road all week. He knows of a massage parlor off of the highway that is known to have prostitutes so he decides to stop in. The Madam greets him at the door and asks what he is looking for. He hands her $500 and says, […]